Being the stubborn yoke that I am I went online and I found another option.It’s only available here on a trial bases and I’m not eligible for that trial, but my oncologist thinks she can get it on compassionate request. A few weeks ago I could hardly breath and chemo seemed like my best option and as the cancer was in my scull too I was really concerned about my brain. According to my oncologist cancer to the brain usually spreads from the blood not…Continue Reading “Palbo”
An insight into the side effects that come with metastatic breast cancer treatments ( I have experienced several of them already), why some of us would rather go the alternative route and why these decisions are so difficult. On Tuesday I had my port put in in preparation for IV chemo, which I still haven’t confirmed I’m having. Deep down I know I probably have very little choice as the cancer is progressing but I just can’t come to terms with it and how it…Continue Reading “Side effects”
I guess I’ve made my decision, I looked at wigs today, I’m not happy about it, I wish we had better treatment options. It wasn’t as bad as I expected (I didn’t howl), but I’m really struggling with this one, because it’s not temporary, when it’s gone it’s gone, thats it. But here we go, the first pic top left is the real deal, the next two are my favourites so far, just checking styles not necessarily colours although who knows? Quite fancy myself as…Continue Reading “Wigs”
So after kicking up a bit of a fuss I finally got home yesterday.I have to admit for this fiercely independent, control freak, free spirit it was 12 days of total hell, although I suspect the suffocating stench of urine and feces, the sound of bowel movements over lunch, the sight of a trolley full of nappies and a little oldie sobbing every time a visitor left would test most people. The good news is there was no fluid around the heart and the fluid…Continue Reading “Dying seems like the easy bit”
Oh my good god, well I guess it is April fools day after all. So I arrive in Dublin at the crack of dawn and wait around half the day to have a pericardiocentesis, a painfull sounding procedure that involves putting a tube in the chest to drain fluid from the heart while semi – conscious and using an echo machine. I’m on the opperating table have just been given sedation when they examine the screen and see that there is no extra fluid and…Continue Reading “April fool”
I now have an infection from the canuala,more antibiotics and still no sign of them sending me to Dublin. I want to go home, I am seriously losing my mind 😢😷😭😢😷
So I’m finally being shipped to Dublin in the morning to have my first little heart procedure.It’s a bit scary but to be honest I am so tired fighting to have it done I haven’t the energy to worry about it. So wish me luck and say a couple of prayers if you like and I’ll catch you all soon. ❤❤❤Exhausted Kitty
Just like that the lights gone out, the spark has gone. That spark that sustained me through invasive ductal carcinoma, bone and hepatic metastases. The spark that kept me joking through mastectomy and joyous despite right pleural effusion. Now there is just a tiredness, an apathy infiltrated by deep saddness, occassional anger and sickening self-pity. And she’s not surprised by significant progression of bone metastases to the thoracic, lumbar and sacral spine. It has been three years after all, aren’t I lucky, she thinks…Continue Reading “Spark”
So it doesn’t look like I’ll be going anywhere exciting over Easter😮, maybe just to James’s in Dublin to have fluid drained from round my heart. It’s starting to look like this most probably isn’t an infection😣😢. Not quite sure whats coming😮. I’d kill for a back rub 😢
Back in the Nick😣😢.Last night was terrifying, I couldn’t breath, like drowning. I had another Xray this morning and a little fluid on the lung has turned into a lot of fluid on the lung in a week. I’m wheezing like an 90 year old and even walking a bit leaves me winded. Why is the question, cancer or infection??? Apparently I’m going to be Tapped( lol, thats drained) to see. Trying not to think about it too much, just couldn’t go through another night…Continue Reading “Breathless”
