There is a place you go when you get this kind of news, a place where time stands still and you exist in a kind of hazy bubble, a surreal underworld. You shut out everything and indulge yourself, you wallow in your selfishness. It is actually quite a pleasant place to be despite having to pass through hell to get there. You do everything to push it down to distract yourself, eventually you pull it back and toy with it, you try it out for size, you see if you can make it fit, knowing full well you really don’t have a choice. Finally you absorb it in, it begins to sit that bit easier. The bubble bursts and you come back to reality. You take it on and move forward, you carry on because you must, till next time.